Tuesday, May 3, 2011

Going easy on myself

I was getting so overwhelmed recently with these thoughts:
Gotta spend time with my kids
Gotta have more date nights with Jay
Gotta find quiet time to pray each day
Gotta read the bible every day
Gotta eat better
Gotta learn to cook
Gotta be better about housekeeping
Gotta work out
Gotta get together with friends regularly
Gotta gotta gotta...!!!
Man am I drained just writing that out!  I think most women understand my list though.  I'm not unique.  But how I might be unique, (at least at this point in my life), is that I am no longer holding onto my GOTTA list and stressing about it or feeling guilty about not being so great at life (aka being a Proverbs 31 woman!)
Here's what I am doing successfully each day though... I am joyful. I choose to be happy whether my kitchen is cluttered or the kitchen is clean.  And I am loving my kids whether we are running the roads or just looking at ant hills in our yard.
I have also decided to let go of the guilt I feel about my bible time.  I have never been one to just sit and open my bible and read.  I prefer bible studies.  But the way I am staying tapped into God's word and His way of living is to listen to broadcasts on FamilyTalk, to read encouraging emails sent regularly from Proverbs 31 Ministry, read Christian books, and spend time with encouraging people.
I refuse to stop beating myself up over all the things I should be doing, and just choose a good attitude first and foremost.  I find the rest falls into place much better when I do that anyway.
So that's where I am today.  I'm wondering if this is a common revelation of women in their mid-30s?  haha... either way... I'm glad to be in this place in life.  It really feels good.  And I am grateful to God for the life He has given me.


Jessica @ This Blessed Life said...

i totally could have written everything on your "gotta" list. that dang proverbs 31 woman! lol happy that you've found a place where you feel better about your time and priorities...jealous, but happy for you. ;)

Kathy said...