I lost my maternal grandmother yesterday, and the last of that generation in my family. With her departure it feels like I’ve lost my grandfather all over again too. Especially since growing up, it was always “Nan and Gramp”. He’s been gone almost 12 years but since I don’t live there, it’s hard to think of him gone to be honest, and now Nan. I have lived away from my hometown for 30 years and due to distance and covid, I haven’t been back to visit in almost 6 years. During that time my grandmother's health declined quite a bit and she passed after her organs shut down; her body was tired.
My grandmother was 38 when I was born and she wasn’t too pleased about being a young grandmother. Ha ha... too bad! Look how cute I was!
It all worked out because when my daughter was born, we were 5 generations alive and got this great photo! How cool that Gramp got to see his granddaughter's daughter have a kid. {Two in fact!}
my mom, me and my daughter in 2006.
My grandmother used to host Christmas every year for our
family. I have fond memories of being
there Christmas Eve to watch her and Gramp open Christmas gifts and then we’d
eat something yummy that she cooked up. I loved the nuts and chocolate she had in the basement on the coffee table. We all went back the next day because she always hosted Christmas dinner for my mom, her two sisters and family.
Those moments were some of my favorite childhood memories. Nan was known for her pies, especially her
strawberry and strawberry rhubarb. She was always cooking and I can’t
smell boiling potatoes or fish frying without thinking of her. {My mom said she was baking pies last week before her passing!}
Nan always had her nails done and I used to play with her nail polish bottles, pretending they were little people. She took me to a work party when I was a kid where Santa gave out gifts to the children. {The gifts were purchased by the families.} I was thrilled that she got me a Michael Jackson doll! He and my Barbies had a great time!
She took me to visit different family members and friends like my great-Aunt Grace, my godmother and her mom, Leah & Lynn, Dick, my great-greatfather, who are just a few who come to mind.
I moved away at age 15 and returned at 19. I lived in my hometown a year and a half before leaving again at age 20. During the time I was there Nan and I bonded over Days of Our Lives. I went to Bingo with her back in the smoky days with old ladies and lucky troll dolls. She loved her yard sales and always looked for a bargain and that spirit lives strong in me!
When she was younger, Nan enjoyed quilting and I still have my baby blanket from her. In her later years she used Facebook and I was impressed with her getting on there! Even though I haven’t seen her in years, I am grateful for the phone chats and the ease of sharing pictures on Facebook.
The last time I visited was in 2017 before we moved from the east coast to Arizona. My sister hosted a party for the whole family and this is a super special memory for me. I met my nephew and cousin's baby. I got this fun group shot and there's Nan sitting center left. All of us gathered, started because of her and Gramp so many years ago.
When we lived in CT, we traveled to New Brunswick as much as we could and I treasure the photos of her meeting each of my babies during those trips. She didn't leave Saint John much. In fact I asked her why she didn't travel and she said, "Why would I ever leave? Saint John has everything you need!" haha!
One of my favorite things about Nan is that she always sent me a card for my birthday. No matter where I lived, or how far away I was from her, she got a card to me. I love the cards from the early days where it was personalized with my age or “granddaughter”. Her consistency and tangible reminder that she was thinking of me contributed to my love of cards. Back before the long-distance plans we have now, she was faithful in writing me letters and keeping in touch. Those little gestures meant so much to me.
Nan had been housebound since the years of restriction due to the covid pandemic and her deteriorating health. She lived in her own home til she took a turn for the worse and went to the hospital only a few days ago. She had wonderful caretakers who helped her. I am also thankful that my mom and my two aunts were always there for her and helped her with her finances, shopping and having tea with her.
The best advice Nan ever gave me was when she was having health problems years ago before her stroke and subsequent decline, was that us young people take our health for granted. I took that to heart and because of her comment, I know to appreciate what I have and to take care of my body best I can.
My grandmother was not known as a great woman of faith, however, she was the one who bought me first bible before getting me set up to take confirmation classes in the Anglican church when I was 9. She was the only family member I remember going to church at Christmas. She never talked about her beliefs with me but I pray that she found comfort in her last days and felt peace knowing where she was going. Here’s a sweet picture of her holding me at my baby baptism in our old church, St. Jude’s.
I am going to miss her but am glad she is now at peace and reunited with my grandfather. Nan and Gramp together... the way it always was and the way it should be.
I love you Nan.
I can hear her reply, "I love you too dear."
Mary